Letter to a stupid driver that needs to see some jail time

by beagooddad on November 14, 2006

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Dear Stupid,

Thanks for not killing my wife. Sideswiping a car seems to cause a lot less damage than rear ending or head on. She is fine and managed to still bowl three strikes in a row tonight. Also, thanks for deciding to run into one of our cars when the kids were not in it. It is bad enough to think of my wife being scared by the situation. I guess I can take some amount of comfort in not needing to worry about my kids being afraid of the car from now on.

But seriously, how do you end up on the inside shoulder when the traffic is moving and then crash into five cars while bouncing off the concrete divider wall. And, how do you at times end up with two of your tires on the wall. And, then how do you just drive away like nothing ever happened.

Unfortunately for you, they have these things called license plates that help the police track down who owns the car. I’m not 100% sure, since I’ve never tried it, but I think that hitting a bunch of stuff with your car and then driving away is frowned upon. I even think they have some kind of special law against it.

I hope you have insurance so we can get our deductible back when the shop fixes the car.

I also hope you have a little extra money set aside so you can afford to pay your bail. Actually, I could care less what happens to you once they determine whether you have insurance or not. If you really need a few bucks, I’ll send you a pack of smokes.

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