Handling a stubborn daughter

by beagooddad on February 16, 2007

Geetle is going through quite a stubborn streak recently. She needs to be constantly entertained. Even when she is, she is grumpy and bored. She is constantly telling us she won’t do stuff. This is a very typical conversation these days.

“I want to watch TV.”
“No, it’s time to clean up your toys.”
“But…I want to watch TV. Arthur’s on.”
“No. It is time to clean up your toys. ”
“But….”
“No more buts. It is time to clean up your toys.”
“Okay. I’ll watch Arthur.”
“Go sit down on the naughty chair.”

In case you are not sure, Geetle is the one who is supposed to be picking up the toys in this script. I’m sure this is a pretty normal conversation for parents of 4 year olds that are going on 16. And, if I had some great advice to fix the problem, I would tell you. I promise. But, I don’t.

So, if anybody has one of those adorable newborn -18 month olds that I remember so fondly and is interested in seeing what bigger kids are like. I would be willing to trade with you for the next year or so.

If you are going through a similar phase at your house, you can try the techniques I mentioned here for breaking boredom cycles, but they won’t work. Four year olds are crazy.

Related posts:

  1. The Terrible 1s
  2. Handling an tantrum with an autistic kid
  3. Hannah Montana versus SpongeBob Square Pants
  4. Getting a lot older really quickly

{ 2 trackbacks }

An Island Life » Carnival of Family Life #42
February 18, 2007 at 10:20 pm
A Couple of Carnivals to Check Out -- Let’s Talk Babies -- Tips for parenting, pregnancy, and all things baby…
February 21, 2007 at 6:10 pm

{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

Holly Schwendiman February 16, 2007 at 2:38 pm

Ah – as the mother of a 4 year old I can relate too well. Glad to know someone else can commiserate with me. ;)

Hugs,
Holly
Holly’s Corner

Brian (dad to 3) February 16, 2007 at 4:41 pm

We try to snip it at the first “But”; that would have resulted in a timeout in our house. The correct response to “Clean up your room” is “Yes Mommy/Daddy”. You’re allowed to state your case after that, but it has to start with Yes. As in, “Yes, Daddy, but you know they are actually my brother’s toys.”

It’s hard not to give a 4 year old a second chance, but, you know what, they learn quickly.

MOM February 16, 2007 at 7:39 pm

Brian has a pretty good idea to try…..which I’m sure you will or already have. Maybe modeling would help when she asks for something that you would ordinarily say no to, says yes but……Yes, but if you eat a cookie now you will not get one later when your brother gets one. Yes, you may watch arthur now instead of picking up your toys but if I have to pick up your toys that means I won’t have time to ……. or I will pick them up and put them in a big black garbage bag. That used to work when you were a kid and I never really threw anything away.

kailani February 16, 2007 at 8:05 pm

My 4 year old daughter is like that, too. I think someone switched my good girl when I wasn’t looking.

beagooddad February 17, 2007 at 10:54 pm

We’re pretty sure it is mostly just a phase. She’s gone through similar stubborn stretches before. We make sure to let her know we don’t think it is cool and send her to the naughty chair when she gets too out there.

The offer to swap for a cute cuddly baby is off the table though. She was nice most of the morning today. Maybe we’re getting close to getting the nice Geetle back.

Stephanie February 19, 2007 at 5:01 am

Funny I was just thinking of posting on the same subject, only for my almost 3 year old boy. “Determination” is wonderful isn’t it?!

Stephanie February 19, 2007 at 5:02 am

oops here via CFL ! LOL

Lisa February 19, 2007 at 8:03 am

I don’t have kids yet myself, but I remember when my little brothers were that age. It just seems that every kids has to go through that stage.

Here via the carnival of family life.

Samantha February 19, 2007 at 10:43 am

As the mother of 4 year old twin daughters, I can sooo relate to this LOL All I can hope for is that it will get better in the years to come… I came via CFL :)

Trevor Carpenter February 19, 2007 at 2:21 pm

I know this stage all too well. My #3, is 2 year old now and his favorite line is, “That’s not fair.”

That one he got from one of the older ones.

He also picked up something not so cute from me.

Cipriana April 14, 2009 at 6:59 pm

My situation is so depressing that I actually googled “extremely stubborn daughter” and this blog appeared at the top of the list.
My daughter refuses to cooperate in anything she considers routine, such as washing her teeth, having a bath. She spends almost a hour running around naked thinking its really funny that mummy is waiting by the sink with a cup and toothbrush. I just don“t find it funny anymore.

beagooddad April 15, 2009 at 6:12 am

Sorry to hear you are having so much trouble right now. Stay consistent. Stay calm. And find little ways to make the boring things more interesting. Sometimes just asking our daughter normal everyday questions like “What are you going to take for snack to school tomorrow?” will get her to perk up.

It will get better as long as you stay consistent and calm.

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